Why Blog.

Posted in Uncategorized with tags , , on April 11, 2009 by akbaxter

As I gear myself up for a summer of writing, I find that there are some nagging questions about the form, or perhaps more accurately forum I have decided to write in.

Blogging, like digital photography, has transformed the practice and art of writing from being the expression of well-thought out and framed ideas into a barfing of opinions into the ether on the slim pretense that these opinions are is in fact something more, something greater and more important that what they actually are. The blog-o-sphere, as it has been so termed in a spirit of carnival-esque whimsy, is not a realm of ideas or truth (if such a thing can be said to exist today) but rather a space for opinion.

The day of the expert is dead and gone and we should exult his demise and at the same time shed a tear that he has become not so much unimportant, but obsolete and irrelevant. The blog has ‘democratised’ writing in a way that talk radio democratised the airwaves…not in a unifying, socially engaged discussion about the values and goals of our society, rather in a race away from the middle, a competition of epic proportions that pits the rabid forces of reactionary prejudice against the amoral progressives hell bent of tearing down the very structures and institutions that give them voice.

Here we find ourselves in the midst of a great revolution, and as the old ways and values and expectations come crashing down around us we must find a way to speak and converse. The physical public spaces of our cities, the old, traditional sites of democratic expression are choked with the most undemocratic machines to have come spewing forth from the belching depths of the industrial age, the automobile, and people and their ideas are not welcome there. And so we move into cyber-space, also termed in a spirit of whimsy (more Terminator and apocalyptic struggle for Earth in the face of alien robot invasion than children’s amusement park ride this time, however), into the frontier of our human pursuit for ever-higher values and inclusion as it is now taking shape.

Blogging, as it now is and as mentioned earlier, and as can be readily observed from a quick scan of the available examples, is a spontaneous explosion of words…some making sense, much however, painfully, not. It is the journalism of the masses, journalism that requires no more effort than scanning online news sources and screaming your outrage or muttering menacingly under your breath about the decline of western civilisation. But what makes it so much more, and in fact so much less than the old media, than the old forms is that it can be a conversation. This is where the value lies. Not in truth and fact and lies and politics, but rather in an inclusionary conversation.

That being said, we are not there yet. We hide in our own little cocoons of cynicism, in the warmth of our own people, our own opinions. We are still afraid of each other, and so express this fear in aggression and offense. The blogging world is still a mean place and trades in reactionary zeal.

Why then blog.

To join the conversation. To hone the skills necessary to join the conversation. To add another perspective.

And with that…it starts anew. Comment and disagree.

A Little Bit of Self-Promotion

Posted in Vancouver with tags on January 14, 2009 by akbaxter

I have to say that I am humbly proud of myself…take a look, and pat me on the back.

Strangers in the City.

Posted in Canada, Politics, Vancouver with tags , , on December 11, 2008 by akbaxter

As I wander down the street just minding my own business, a thought creeps into my head, just, it seems, to nag at me a little. I weave in and out on the busy sidewalk, side-stepping a woman who’s just stopped to browse at a window display and wonder how it is that we can all possibly live here together in the city. What keeps this whole show from coming to a crashing halt? Just then, a familiar face holds out his cap and asks for some spare change.

Waves of people, anonymous and unknown, streaming by us, standing next to us in line, simply sharing the same space with us. This is the urban condition. A cacophony of disconnected and seemingly random voices and noises, sounds and smells subsume us in a world of the unknown. In the city, day and night melt together, winter and summer merge seamlessly with the quiet turning of a door handle. The city is confusing and senseless. Life in the city, it seems, is always in flux, always moving, awake and changing. It has no beginning nor end, no start or finish, no yesterday or tomorrow, there is just now, just today. It is the negation of time, of season, of continuity.

A dreary morning has given way to a sleepy sun that could barely lift itself above the roof of the apartment across the street and now seems content to nod off again casting long fall shadows.

I slow up. Something smells good. Glancing across the street a line up has already started forming outside a popular restaurant around the corner. Just before dark, right on cue.

We often think of neighbourhoods as places, as the streets and parks and buildings that surround us everyday. We think of buildings and roads and crowded buses. These are the things that stay the same, that give us that connection between what happened yesterday and what’s happening now. They are the bricks and mortar, the timeless, unchanging glass and steel that keeps time from running amok and immersing us forever in the unintelligible chaos of the city street. These are the things we know to be true.

The physical infrastructure of our built environments is critical in the linear progression of our lives, as the glue, the watch face upon which the seconds can be counted away, the backdrop in front of which we play out the days games. Without this certainty, city live would be impossible.

But look a little closer. Our neighbourhoods are filled with people, with a lot of people, most of whom are not known to us. The canvas onto which is painted our daily lives is more than simply the physical space we occupy. 

The city is filled with strangers.  All around us a thousand bit players, hundreds of extras, unaware that they are all playing roles in each others lives. We are all strangers here. Even those we think we know, the guy at the bakery or your favourite barista, those people that we come across during the course of our day, are in fact stage props.

And yet it is these people who fill out our experiences as we navigate our way through the city each day. We are all strangers here, and yet we are not alone.

These strangers are simply part of the city, elements of the architecture, accessories and  props in our daily routine of feeding and entertaining ourselves. And yet it is these people that we rely on to give the places we live, shop, and work some predictability, some feeling of security, of home.

These are the people we enter into a thousand tiny, often unnoticeable relationships with in each and every encounter. It is these people with which we constantly create the links, however informal, that stand at the core of urban living.

We are able to live in the places we do because we have some certainty, some continuity to the ebb and flow, the comings and goings and seeming chaos of the city. It is not necessarily that the physical space in which we live stays the same, is predictable, and feels like home. While this is surely important, it is the fact that the same people are in the same place everyday. Place is far more than the space it occupies, it is the people and indeed, the relationships that remain there, day in and day out.

I work my way down the crowded sidewalk and burst into the warm, steamy confines of the local burger shack. I ponder my order, but I always get the same thing so the pause is noticeable to only the keenest of observers.

 Order placed, the cashier asks uncommittedly, “Name.” More of a statement than anything else. “Andrew!” I look around shocked, and a little worried. “That’s it, isn’t it?” The other girl behind the counter asks above the slow din of the place. “Yeah,” I look up smiling, “that’s it.”

A Thanksgiving Prayer.

Posted in Outrage with tags , on November 30, 2008 by akbaxter

In this season of thanksgiving…

For John Dillinger
In hope he is still alive
Thanksgiving Day, November 28, 1986

Thanks for the wild turkey and the Passenger Pigeons, destined to be shit out through wholesome American guts

thanks for a Continent to despoil and poison —

thanks for Indians to provide a modicum of challenge and danger —

thanks for vast herds of bison to kill and skin, leaving the carcass to rot —

thanks for bounties on wolves and coyotes —

thanks for the AMERICAN DREAM to vulgarize and falsify until the bare lies shine through —

thanks for the KKK, for nigger-killing lawmen feeling their notches, for decent church-going women with their mean, pinched, bitter, evil faces —

thanks for “Kill a Queer for Christ” stickers —

thanks for laboratory AIDS —

thanks for Prohibition and the War Against Drugs —

thanks for a country where nobody is allowed to mind his own business —

thanks for a nation of finks — yes, thanks for all the memories… all right, let’s see your arms… you always were a headache and you always were a bore —

thanks for the last and greatest betrayal of the last and greatest of human dreams.

~~ William S. Burroughs

 

wsburroughs1

A War by Families.

Posted in Outrage with tags , , , , , on November 29, 2008 by akbaxter

There is a war taking place, hell, its been taking place for generations if not longer, and this is, essentially, a war against Fun!

This war is waged under the banner of Family Values, words that hide a very sinister agenda, that mask a desperate, feverish drive to rid the world of all those who don’t subscribe to the absurdly sanitized notions of love and life, of right and wrong, good and evil. Honest to god fun and good times are in a rip-snorting death match with the forces of darkness, monotony, boredom.

Last year some time, a couple of mothers with strollers walked into the Earl’s in downtown Vancouver. Now Earls’ is not a bastion of anti-establishment anarchists bent on knocking over the status quo, but on this fateful day would be shoved smack dab in the middle of the battle between the two foundational drives, the drive to order, and the drive to disorder. Okay, I may be overselling the point at this particular moment, but bear with me and we’ll take this journey together.

Upon learning that this particular restaurant, not all Earl’s but just this one mind you, in the downtown core, overflowing with that crowd, you know the one…all dressed up and going to Earl’s!! these two women, children, howling no doubt, in tow became incensed, outraged that they, and their children would not be accommodated at this particular location of Earl’s, remember, just this one, this is important, and so took this discrimination to the local media outlets, crying bloody murder.

Oh, the hue and cry that went up from mothers, notice fathers absent from this whoop-up, everywhere across the city. How dare a business not accommodate us?! We are women with children, and as such should be able to go anywhere and do whatever we want. Our children should be admitted into the havens of adulthood, should be allowed free-run of the place, screaming their shrill squeals, slipping down from chairs to chase imaginary fairies from table to table. Oh, look, their so cute!

The ensuing maelstrom pitted the rights of a restaurant to culture a certain atmosphere, an atmosphere of joviality, of boisterousness, of good times against the rights of families to impede into this atmosphere, of children to be allowed to dominate an environment, as dominate they would.

Outraged natterers filled the airwaves and oped pages as the furor bubbled and boiled. Why had adults a place of their own? Outrageous!

Another interesting moment is this war came about last year as the Merrit Mountain Music Festival, renowned for its, ahem, adult-oriented, somewhat debaucherous atmosphere decided to try and re-sell itself as a, and I kid you not, “family-friendly” event; code word, boring. How absolutely ridiculous.

Family-friendly is code for sanitized, ordered, quiet. Ever sat in the “family” section at a ball game…no beer, and therefore, fun-free. “Hey, sit down up there! My kid can’t see.”

As I said before, this is not a new war, the battles have been long-running, and at times bloody. But it seems, in this city at least, families are on the offensive, kicking people in the shins and screaming “You’re it” and running away, shrieking. It seems that when kids want to run amok in crowds of adults, they are welcomed. “No, he isn’t bothering me. Just lighting my shoelaces on fire and muttering curse words at me. He’s so cute. How old is he?”

Tripping the rampaging child as he runs down the aisles is frowned upon.

Adults need their spaces too. There need to be events and occasions when getting drunk and falling down is not so much frowned upon as simply chuckled at.

I’m wandering here, so let me return to the battle at hand.

I suppose its no surprise that family values are in fact highly conservative values. One need only look at how your friends change as children enter their lives, and it is indeed understandable that children begin to take centre stage in parents lives. You want a safe place for these young ones to grow and prosper and learn. And truly, I am not suggesting that children don’t need protection and nurturing, but some sanity would be helpful.

Modern notions of the family find ancestry in petty bourgeoisie sensitivities. To make a long, and certainly much more complicated story incredibly short, as this lower middle class began to emerge from the chaos of the industrialising city, they were confronted on daily basis with the disorder, the smells and sounds of a rapidly shifting urban landscape as it moved from medieval order into neo-industrial disorder. The chaos

Unable to insulate themselves from the daily assault, as the aristocracy and merchants were now increasingly able to do, they set about re-ordering public space so as to conform to family-centred normality and sensitivities. Faced, almost daily by the “fun” of the lower orders, the petit bourgeoisie began to regulate it, confine it, hide it, and in essence relegate certain activities, certain modes of recreation and, indeed, certain very human behaviours as anti-social…read, not pleasant in the eyes of those who were becoming the masters of the public domain. The pageantry of the streets was driven indoors, stowed away into the private realm.

The family has colonised the street, indeed the vats majority of the public realm and is now pushing into the private.

In some places, the kids are paraded out in the social war on those last remaining vices, smoking and rock n’ roll. Can’t smoke a cigarette in your car? Kids. How about down at English Bay? Well, that might be a problem, a lot of kids running around who might happen to get a whiff of your poison smoke. A beer? God no! The kids might get an idea.

Hey, how about standing at a concert? No way! There are kids about, and they need to learn that life isn’t fun…its hard work, sacrifice and deference to the mob!

Having thoroughly cleaned up and sanitised the public realm, puritanical values are pushing ever deeper into the private.

Defend yourself! Get drunk, smoke a cigarette, fall over and puke. Trip that snotty little child whose parents refuse to reign him in at all. You’re not sorry. Enjoy it and smile.

Kids may be the future, but they should be taught how to have some fun, let loose, relax and stop worrying so much. Children do not, and should not run the world, should not be the centre of life or society. They are little humans, just like me or you, just smaller and much easier to trip and make cry. Our society should instead rotate around the fulfillment of the human spirit, and sanitizing space, making it germ-free (antiseptic soap?! are you kidding me…see skyrocketing allergy rates among children. driving them to school lest they be abducted…see soaring obesity rates.) and completely safe for our youngsters does them no favours.

Fear seems to drive this project of social sanitization. Parents seem far more worried, and indeed far more fearful of the world than they used to, for no tangible reason as far as I can see. They fear there own fear, see danger around every corner, but in fact fail to see the real danger. The danger involved is in sheltering children too much, in hiding them from the world, protecting them from all the elements and thus creating a whole generation that can’t understand that other people have rights to, and it is not just themselves who are important and should be accommodated.

A society like that is no place to raise a family.

Hitchen(s’) Post.

Posted in International, Politics with tags , , , , on November 7, 2008 by akbaxter

Although slightly after the fact, Hitchens’ latest Slate piece fairly articulates, at least as far as I am concerned, the major defect of the Republican electoral machine’s strategy. Not only is it as blunt as a rather large boulder bouldering down a hill, it fails to account for the fact that everybody in the world is watching, and that that world outside actually does matter, just a little.

…and begs the question, does Sarah Palin really have a Republican’s chance in Heaven(!) of seriously contending for what (should?) invariably be a far less radical Republican party leadership?

Hockey mom, indeed.

Quote of My Day.

Posted in Uncategorized with tags , on November 2, 2008 by akbaxter

“Human beings, an intractable lot, are forever ignoring traditions, upsetting agreements, transcending rules, jumping boundaries, and just generally getting themselves into all sorts of mischief.”

   ~~Lyn H. Lofland

 

How true, how true.

Phan-tastic Phillie Phan-tasy!!

Posted in Sports with tags , on October 31, 2008 by akbaxter

The World Series has just concluded, and some parting words at the close of yet another baseball season. I tend to follow the league throughout the year at a very surface level, looking over the standings a few times a week, catching the odd Jays or Mariners game during the week, and Sunday nights on ESPN when you’d get a good match up from different parts of the league. My interest peaks as September begins to cool down a bit and the races for the wild card heat up.

This year was no different. As September gave way to October we saw the mighty Mets crumble yet again under the pressure of, well, pressure. We watched as the upstart Tampa Bay Rays defied all odds and took the almost impossibly competitive American League East. We witnessed a surging Milwaukee club ride the coat tails of C.C. Sabathia and as Manny drove the Dodgers into the lead in the continually underperforming National League West. Overall, a very good draw of talented teams, all with good stories.

And isn’t that what the playoffs are all about? The odyssey of the underdog, of the wily old veteran making his first start, of a young fireballer come straight up from Single A to now pitch in the Big Show. The narrative is integral to the drama that surrounds each pitch, each ground ball up the middle, each towering pop fly, each out as we are carried through a game, each inning a microcosm of the greater whole, of the soul of the game. We stand and cheer as the closer stares down at the catcher, those glaring, intense eyes burning, checks the runner over his shoulder for the last time, winds up, and….STEE-RIIIICK THREE!! And then, it is all over.

We watched this autumn as Tampa Bay pushed aside a strong Chisox team, then taking a three to one games lead against Boston in the League Championship Series, seemed to fall asleep for just a moment, an inning or two, just enough time for an always powerful and never-quite-dead Red Sox team, as dangerous as a cornered badger with an ice pick, to make the greatest single-game comeback in two generations. Backs broken, the Rays went into game seven clearly underdogs again. A team full of untested youngsters, with no real experience to speak of, with their backs up pressed up against the wall facing a battle hardened club who’d most definitely been there and done that. 

Baseball, like most other sports, is game that any team can win on any given night. But the nature of the game itself, the one-on-one confrontations that take place between hitters and pitchers, the thin line that even the greatest of sluggers walk when the difference between going one for three and falling flat one your face with an o-fer night at the plate is a mere fraction of a second and quarter of an inch, lends itself to huge, oppressive and explosive shifts in momentum, and so as Tampa entered the seventh and decisive game of the series, all bets had to be on the team from Beantown.

But, as the great Yoggi Berra, that Bard of Baseball, once said, “It ain’t over ’til the fat lady sings.” And so it was not. The greenhorns from Florida came out swinging, with energy and flash, and made the Sox look like the tired, old men that they were. Suddenly, there was a new American League champ, and neither New York and Boston was anywhere to be seen.

In the National League, we saw a resurgent Dodgers team, a veritable roster of all-stars headed by the legendary Joe Torri of Yankee lore and backed by the Bad Boy of Baseball, the man who need only be introduced by one name, Manny. Up against another powerhouse, the David to New York’s Goliath, the Philadelphia Phillies were backed by outstanding pitching, from front to back, from starters to a perfect(!) closer, and an offense not to turn your back on lest they pull out a shive and shank you from behind like some sort of jailhouse assassin. (They are from Philadelphia as you know!)

Los Angeles’ starters wilted under the lights and the offense, Manny, who hit over five hundred in the series, excluded, chose golf over the World Series, and good riddance! An ignominious end to a truly underperfoming team from the most disrespected, and rightly so, division in professional baseball.

And so the Phillies were through. The Phillies, who in their one hundred and thirty year record as a franchise had won ONE World Series, that back in 1980, and had only been to the finals once since to face a glorious defeat at the hands of the almighty Blue Jays in ‘93. All you Canucks fans, you somewhat lovable duffusses who continually grip about the losing tradition here in Vancouver, please shut it! Baseball has far greater tales of woe and defeat than you can every, however cleverly, craft from the thirty or so lowly years of incompetence.

The Phillies were up against a Tampa Bay team that had the worst record in baseball last year, who’d spent the past seven years of their forgettable existence at or near the bottom of not only their division, but of the entire league.

Oh, the Drama. What a story.

The World Series started off in Tampa as the American League had won the AllStar game in July. You see, as some cleverly engineered ploy to make the Allstar game relevant (but truly, why need it be relevant?) the league that wins this game of beer-soaked slowpitch, gets homefield advantage, and so Brad Lidge, the perfect reliever, the Phillie Phenom, came in to close the Allstar game with the National league ahead for the first time in living memory. He proceeded to blow his only save of the year (a stat not recorded in the records, because as I stated before, the game is however hard they try to make it meaningful, essentially meaningless…or why else would they not count stats from that game), and so, the American League, with its dastardly Designated Hitter, was once again the Home Team.

Tropicana Field, so eloquently named after a brand, nonetheless tasty, of orange juice is a covered dome, a throwback to the rage that swept through sports in general to disconnect the game from it roots, to sanitize and basically kill the spirit of sport itself on the alter of “perfect” conditions, to remove Mother Nature and essentially the variables of weather from the equation, and to have athletes play on cement as opposed to grass and dirt. The world, or at least those of us who watch The World Series, witnessed the blistering power and speed of B.J. Upton in centre field for Tampa, one of the most relaxed and flowing centre fielders in the game, reminiscent of a younger Devon White as he floats back on a soaring fly ball, nonchalantly, and  effortlessly tracking down and almost lazily catching balls that no one had right to catch. The defense of the Tampa infield with the cat-like Longoria on third and that wily Japanese import, Iwamura on second was spectacular, ranging this way and that, knocking down screamers up the middle to make impossible double plays. And on the bases, speed, unprecedented, with the Rays stealing far more bases than any team in history.

Philadelphia offered its own swagger. Although, we weren’t witness to the hitting prowess of the Phillies until they returned home to Citizens Bank Park(?), they somehow managed, however self-defeatingly to push over at least a couple of runs. We left Tampa with a split, and the stage was set for a showdown in the City of Brotherly Love.

Coming alive at home, the Phillies’ were finally able to hit with runners in scoringposition after having gone something like two for forty on previous nights, and no matter what the young Rays did, the Phillie bested them by at least one in the next three games. A highlight was when the forty-two year old Jamie Moyer, beaten like the proverbial dead horse in his previous post season starts, made his first World Series appearance and proceeded to throw 82 mph fastballs and 79 mph breaking balls with such grace and perfection that all the Rays batters could do was tip their hat to the old man, and wander on back to the dugout.

And, their bullpen did not disappoint. With a regular season undefeated record when winning going into the ninth, the Phillies bullpen was again perfect, and Lidge, that drunken Allstar, did not blemish his pristine record as closer.

Just before embarking on this exercise in descriptive writing, a stat appeared on the tv screen in which seventy percent of respondents believed this was the most unfulfilling World Series ever, but I wonder why this was so. We had two teams with extraordinary power and skill, two teams known for futility, two teams of relative unknowns showing the way forward in Baseball. While both teams relied on the long ball to score many of their runs, there was an awesome display of speed and ingenuity on the base paths, with some very creative play calling; there was even  a squeeze play!! Fuck ya! A squeeze play! This was the new face of baseball, post steroid scandal, post Barry Bonds and Roger Clemens, post Yankees and Bosox steamrollers. The most unsatisfying World Series ever was last year, a four game sweep by Boston against a sleepy team from Colorado in which it was never even close. This year, almost every game was close, and while it went only the now regulation five games, I think that Baseball, professionally, is entering a new era and has the new heroes to prove it.

And so we bid farewell to yet another year of the Great American Pastime, and look forward fondly to the spring when yet again that wonderful sound of wood meeting leather, of roaring crowds, the smell of fresh cut lawns and hotdogs, return and we can, for at least a few hours forget our worries, sit back, grab an overpriced beer, and strike up a casual conversation with the stranger next to us about that bum behind the plate and how he can’t even catch a curve ball.

Remember, Baseball is not only, if not even primarily, about the action on the field. It involves a whole orbit of stories and characters, of pasts and futures, of disappointment (see Cubs fans) and failures. Baseball is a game of statistics. But more importantly, baseball is a game of drama. It is slow enough that even the drunk can follow along, but complex enough to keep the sober thinking about what’s next, and gives you a chance to fully absorb the totality of the game itself, not just the homerun, touchdown, or breakaway.

I See “Stupid” People.

Posted in International, Politics with tags , , , , on October 24, 2008 by akbaxter

My last post caught the ire of rural America, and I want to thank [l]indsay for watching my back there. My response to www.RFDAmerica.com/ is this: I hope you will come back and visit soon.

 While I most certainly do not make the mistake of terming all farm folk “stupid” please don’t call me an elitist. I drink cheap, shitty beer too. I pick fights with my friends and shoot my guns into the sky in a blind rage against “towel heads” and “that terrorist Barrack Obama” who want to take away my right to teach my children that the world is only a few thousand years old even though nobody with the slightest bit of common sense (and let me here take back this term from the far right) would make this assumption unless told to by some man from the pulpit.

I too believe that supporting the troops is best achieved by wearing small lapel pins and yellow ribbons, and prodly announcing that anyone who doesn’t is a traitor. I too believe that supporting our soldiers is equal to supporting the war, or how else are they going to be able to collect their Danger Pay!

So please, join me, clasp hands and sing kumbaya followed immediately by a rousing version of Toby Keith’s newest patriotic jingle, “Fuck You World, I’m an American and I can cry if I want to.”

Would the Real America please stand up.

Posted in Canada, International, Politics with tags , , , , , , on October 22, 2008 by akbaxter

John Stewart seems a little hot under the collar if you’ll pardon my colloquialism. Last night’s Daily Show  was perhaps the best I had ever seen, from beginning to end (Colbert capped the evening with his usual wit, an interview with Fareed Zakaria, and a trumpet duet.)

What really struck me was the Two Solitude narrative being peddled by the Republicans, and in particular, by Palin. The United States is a huge country and there is no doubt that it is essentially divided between those who live in rural areas and those in cities. Much the same can be said for Canada as well if you’ll simply peruse the recent election results; the Conservatives, bless their little hearts can’t seem to find a way to win urban seats (notwithstanding Calgary, but no one really considers that a city!) Oh sure, they’ve surrounded the cities with Conservatives, pinching ever closer, and yet, the city walls are, fortunately, holding firm.

But I am off track. This is a topic for a future blog, so stay tuned and look for it at Take Off, Eh!

The point is that while most of the world is probably divided politically and socially quite sharply along rural/urban lines, the idea that the Real America being found in small towns and ultimately with, dare I say it, stupid people (not so much stupid…I went too far) is simply a pandering continuation of the politics of fear, of division, of the Other. And the question need be asked…

Really?

This narrative dumbs down the whole tone of politics, and while fortunately this schism being jackhammered open by that political suicide-bomber Sarah Palin is less dangerous than say a race division, it can only serve to reinforce the real, and seemingly fundamental distrust that those living outside cities, everywhere, have for those living in them. Sure, there are liberals living on farms and there are conservatives living in the cities, but that schism is tied fundamentally, and structurally (Kromalkin!!) to levels of development (which I hope someone else will pick up and further develop…I’m looking at you), and essentially to priorities. But whereas the Palins of this world are not so much stupid as have less scope to their gaze, those who hope to lead us all, together, pitchfork tottin’ farmer and latte drinking homosexual, Joe the Plumber and Joe the Biden, Preston Manning and Ron Jeremy (perhaps the greatest guest duo on that infinitely debatable sports debate show, Off the Record, a few years back) must not play the game of ‘divide and scare the bejesus out of’ because we all do live here, whether its Canada, BC, or the Lower Mainland, together and need to find some way to get along.

Maybe this narrative is seen as a good thing for those who believe that Queers and Communists who run our governments can’t possibly have the interests of Shit-wadding, Sheep-shagging country bumpkins in their hearts, and that those self-same Sheep-shagers can’t possibly stomach the idea of communist faggots having a moral bone in their, but it sure ain’t going to get us any closer to actually addressing the pressing issue of the day; you know, those things that both Queers and Sheep-shagers, Communists and Shit-wadders, Trevor and Juma both feel are important like health care, education, the environment, the fucking financial meltdown! 

Woe to those who see neighbours as enemies. Be careful what you wish for or you too may soon be throwing lattes on pitchfork-wielding farmers from high atop the city walls.